Sometimes you just have to grin and bear it!

A real message from the senior NCO of a section to his subordinate working a different shift.  And sometimes you just have to have a little fun (or go punch him out) and so this is a forward with SFC Jimbolowsky’s dream response.

You may recognize it as a takeoff from the movie “A Few Good Men” where Jack Nicholson’s character has a monologue about protecting the nation from weenies like this.  Enjoy (if you can).

-----Original Message-----

From: Messy-slag, Jorban Q MSG USA USF-I HHC 3-634TH AVN/S-1

Sent: Monday, January 32, 2011 9:27 AM

To: Jimbolowsky, Phister Q SFC USA USD-N HHC 3-634TH AVN/WQUEST0; Zin, Fandel SSG

USA USF-I 3-634th NGB/ABCD-AVN-P

Subject: clean

Apparently when I tell you to clean, you must be too busy to do it. So

please come in on your reset day this week if you can't make sure the

hall-way and office floors are clean. Thanks for your service.

MSG Jorban Messy-slag

3-634TH S-1 NCOIC

TF Big Blade

Joint Base Tikrit, Iraq

NIPR          731-8374

SIPR          543-4982

SFC Jimbolowsky M. Phister: When did you tell me to clean?

MSG Jorban Messy-slag: You want answers?

SFC Jimbolowsky M. Phister: I think I'm entitled.

MSG Jorban Messy-slag: You want answers?!

SFC Jimbolowsky M. Phister: I want the truth!

MSG Jorban Messy-slag: You can't handle the truth!

Son, we live in a world that has hallways and those hallways need to be

guarded by men with mops and brooms. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Captain

Chuckie?

I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom. You

weep for S1 night crew and curse the S1 morning crew; you have that luxury.

You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that CSM Fleck will chew my

Ass if you don't sweep and mop, while tragic, probably saved lives and that

my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives.

You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at

the CHU, I want you sweeping that hallway, I need you mopping that hallway.

We use words like bucket, pine oil, dust pan. We use them as the backbone of

a life trying to clean something. You use them as a punch line.

I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very cleanliness I provide and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said "thank you," and

went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest that you pick up a broom or a mop and

stand a post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you are

entitled to.

SFC Jimbolowsky M. Phister: Did you order to sweep?

MSG Jorban Messy-slag: I did the job I had to do.

SFC Jimbolowsky M. Phister: Did you order to mop?!

MSG Jorban Messy-slag: You're God damn right I did! I'll put it in writing

next time!

Red Dragon, "Space Ranger"

           _________

         /'        /|

        /         / |_

       /         /  //|

      /_________/  ////|

     |   _ _    | 8o////|

     | /'// )_  |   8///|

     |/ // // ) |   8o///|

     / // // //,|  /  8//|

    / // // /// | /   8//|

   / // // ///__|/    8//|

  /.(_)// /// |       8///|

 (_)' `(_)//| |       8////|___________

(_) /_\ (_)'| |        8///////////////

(_) \"/ (_)'|_|         8/////////////

 (_)._.(_) d' Hb         8oooooooopb'

   `(_)'  d'  H`b

         d'   `b`b

        d'     H `b

       d'      `b `b

      d'           `b

     d'             `b

It is clever and maybe a little funny.  But in the stress of dumb stuff and childish leadership sometimes you just need to grin and bear it.