“Whoever told you to come here told everybody to come to the wrong place!”

Even after all the SRP (Soldier Readiness Processing) aviators need to get their annual flight physical.  SO off the XO went with his faithful driver starting at “Oh-my-gosh! That’s early!” in the cold morning fog.  The shortest path is down 36 to the 184 (a small county road) to the East Range Road to get to South Fort Hood.  Did I mention there was fog?  

That new Apple I-pad does a great job navigating in the fog….I recommend you get it out early rather than after you are lost…

On base looking for the TMC (Troop Medical Plaza) at the airfield.  Past the airfield gate guard (“I don’t know sir, but the road just runs straight for two miles…”) All the way down and on the way back they answer “Medical Clinic…” “Awww…I see the sign disregard”. 

Three minutes later out he comes.  Wrong place.  We need to go to the other clinic.  Four miles, past the MP station, there it is!  An hour and a half later.  Okay, we need to go to the Vision clinic.  Really?  

Normally they have these things in the same building, but here at SFH we need to go to West Fort Hood.  Really?  Where is that at?  No address, just the building name and some vague directions.  

Let me ask for directions.  “Hey!  Do you know how to get to West Fort Hood?”  Four miles later through the gate “Do you know where the Vision Clinic is?” and then two miles down the road and there it is!

An hour later and now we are off to the dental clinic, which is a part of the Darnall Medical Complex.  A couple hundred yards from where we started the real physical earlier.  Where is that clinic?  

This place is the size of a large shopping mall with different clinics, a hospital and other little buildings.  “Excuse me, can you tell me where the Dental Clinic is?” “See that brown building (about 3-400 yards away)?” “Which one, they are all brown?”  “See that one there!”  Sure.  Thanks.  It has to be one of those buildings over there.  The overcast sky is still making it a little cold and harder to see.  Everybody knows that it is harder to see stuff when it is overcast.

“Excuse me” now that we are at the other end of the complex and still don’t see the sign and which brown building “Can you tell me where the dental clinic is?”  Of course.  Right across that other road in its own little “complex”.      I drop off and go to park.  He is already on the way out I honk and he sees me.

“What did they say?”  “My dental from SRP was good, so if there was no change he just marked it okay.  I didn’t even check in.  It helps if you are mobbing.”  “So they couldn’t do that from the first clinic?”

“No.  I guess not.”  “How about some McDonald’s?  This might be our last chance to have something like that for a year.  How about a Big Mac?”  “Sure”.

I text my 167^th counterpart. “We are going to Outback for lunch.  Hungry?”  She calls me and says I am crazy!  I ask if I am allowed to take my weapon off post to eat there.  She says she doesn't want to know.

First we go to pick up a nametag for my LT.  “I must have violated three different rules I don’t even know about already today.  Am I allowed to take my weapon in here?”  

  That Outback story is a funny (or pitiable) story in itself.  Look for it.